The Year of YES

As I dug deep inside myself and even took a look at my life, I came out with the realization about how much impact two very small words can have in your life. The words I.m referring to are "Yes" and “No"

iuri melo
iuri melo

Hello my good friend. As always, I want to compliment you for your effort... every effort you make counts. I know that sometimes we don't get the outcomes that we want, or sometimes the good that we do isn't reciprocated, but I think it's so important for us to be true to ourselves and not betray our best sense of self.

I'm talking about your principles, your values, your morals. Your personal philosophy or life, your beliefs. I hope that as you've been engaged with us, that you are developing a love and desire to seek for those things in life that are beautiful, hopeful, courageous, and correct. Very soon here I'm going to be doing an episode on Stoicism philosophy, I think you'll enjoy it very much, but before we do... today, I'm here to hype you up a little bit... I'm here to convince you, or at least to encourage you to start saying yes more often.

I admit that this podcast was inspired byt Jim Carries movie "the yes man." Besides being hilarious, that movie sent my mind reflecting and considering that concept. As I dug deep inside myself and even took a look at my life, I came out with the realization about how much impact two very small words can have in your life. The words I'm referring to are "Yes," and "No," and learning how to use them appropriately on a day to day basis can be a challenge. But let me turn your focus to the word "Yes."

I want you to begin something new today, something new this year. I want this to be the year of YES for you. I'm hoping that this podcast will compel you and inspire you to consider your life, and perhaps the way you are living it.

I want you to decide consciously today, and from this moment forward, to always saying YES in these two ways:

  1. Say YES to anything that is exciting, growth promoting, creative, positive, purposeful, and healthy. I find that we say NO too often to the things that can bring us joy, and help us to "live deep and suck out all the marrow of life." Instead, we end up living mundane and sedentary lives, gaming too much, watching too much Netflix and eating copious amounts of popcorn. I can guarantee that you and I were not born to do that. Yes, we can garnish our lives with some of that, but become aware of how much time you are spending there, and instead begin investing in activities where you are creating, where you are learning, where you are living, where you are loving, and where you are contributing.
  2. Say YES to life. Author Byron Katie, in her work "Loving What Is", describes this concept perfectly with these words, "Life is simple. Everything happens for you, not to you. Everything happens at exactly the right moment, neither too soon nor too late. You don't have to like it... it's just easier if you do." Saying NO to life, and saying NO to what has already happened is problematic because it creates a conflict with reality, and closes to door to the learning, and richness that the experience has to offer you. It's important to note that just because I accept something, doesn't mean that I'm engaging life in an unfeeling, or in a passive way. In fact, the opposite is true. By accepting what is occurring, I'm liberated in my ability to fully look at what is happening, and to utilize my conscious abilities toward the most meaningful resolution. Eckardt Tolle, in his book The Power of Now, said it this way: "recognize that most of the stress, anxiety, and depression occurs when we resist the moment we are existing in... if every moment of your life is perceived as a burden or a struggle, completely accept it and give it your full attention. You cannot give something your full attention and at the same time resist it." Quit arguing with what is happening, and instead, start working with what is happening.

Many individuals who step into my office feel stuck in their lives and situations. As I gather a bit more information to further assess their situation, I find that they have grown complacent and thus their existence has become stale. I hope you realize that I'm not saying this in a critical or condemning way... I've been there at moments, and chances that are that you have as well. We can't grow mold and grow happy at the same time. We have to be purposefully engaged in our lives. I'm not suggesting some anxiety producing, overwhelming lifestyle, where you are running 100 miles per hour, doing everything for everyone.

What I am suggesting is that we begin to fully living our lives. That we discover those things that are purposeful and meaningful, that bring us happiness and joy, and that contribute to others around us, and then we engage them directly! I'm not suggesting some "Walter Mitty" like experience; I'm asking you to choose to evolve today and every day after.

I mean hear me our for a quick moment... are you growing spiritually? Intellectually, psychologically, socially, and physically? Are you willing to learn new skills? If you are not taking steps in that direction, then recognize that you are beginning to atrophy in the other direction. Such is the reality of life! Tony Robbins said it this way... "you're either growing or dying" My friends it's true isn't it? We are either growing or atrophying... this is the law of the universe. Whatever we feed and give energy to... grows. Whatever we neglect dies and atrophies. It's time to shake things up! Create some movement in your life, and begin to live your life deliberately instead of by accident.

Here are some ideas of things for you to say YES to:

  • Begin a healthy exercise program. Get rid of your excuses and start walking, running, doing some yoga, whatever it is. If you can do it with a friend that is more motivated than you are, even better.
  • Say Yes to more adventurous or exciting activities
  • Say Yes to new experiences, hobbies, or skills
  • Say Yes to creating goals and objectives in your life
  • There are wonderful books that are inspiring, and helpful, pick one up and nurture your mindset. If you want a list, text me and let's chat about it.
  • Begin a journal. The story of your life matters. Use that journal as a way to document this new way of living your life, wherein you are engaging it in an affirmative manner.
  • Begin a study of spiritual writings. No other books in the history of man have created more change and transformation than those books. Use them!
  • Begin meditating, praying, and reflecting upon your life in forward thinking ways.
  • Pick an excellent therapist, and get to work.
  • Get out of life-sucking cultures that surround drugs, alcohol, and pornography, and say YES to joining cultures that are expansive, growth-oriented, spiritually minded, and moving in a solid direction. Quit being ridiculous, honestly. There is no growth there, get out! Quit being a taker and a partaker, and instead, become a giver and a creator.
  • Begin spending more quality time with your children. Read to them at night. Kiss them every morning and every evening. Go to all their events if possible. Know all of their friends' names, and double your level of interest in their lives (not in a controlling way, but in a loyal and supporting way).
  • The moment you walk into your home, put your phone on silent, take it out of your pants pockets, set it down someplace where you are not tempted to check it every moment, and begin helping your spouse, and being with your children fully. For some of you this may not be fully possible, but if it is, do it, and do it now! Model what it's like to be present and attentive with your children and spouse. Get your face out of your phone and into life!
  • Greet your spouse with a kiss every morning and put them to bed every night with one also. Hold their hand more often, compliment them frequently, date them on a weekly basis (no excuses), give without expectation, listen more fully, be more encouraging. A man that I respect greatly once said that his wife would text him daily, and simply ask "what can I help you with today?" I just think that is beautiful! This woman knows how to say YES to their marriage. Be kinder in your demeanor, repair and forgive quickly, and always use words like Please and Thank you!
  • Say YES to creating a business, writing a book, starting a new hobby, meeting a neighbor, reading a great book, etc.

You'll find that as you begin to engage your life more attentively, that you will begin to reap the rewards of that focus. Become valuable by being valuable. Add some zest and excitement to your life! YES, YES, YES...